17 April 2014

Beauty Parfait: I'm not gone yet! Update

No fancy header with this one folks. Be aware for a long "life" post.

I just wanted to let everyone know, I'm still around. I took an unintentional hiatus without saying anything. I'm not leaving the blogging world though, I'm trying to get myself back into it though!

The last three months have been insanely difficult, especially March.

In January I caught that awesome Super Bug that's flying around. Had to stay home for almost a week because I was running a fever. Basically, I was sick for three weeks.

Then, back in December, I had hurt my back moving something for my next door neighbor. So fast forward to while I'm still getting over the super bug, I get hit with a bad case of sciatica. It was to the point that, I got into work and doubled over from the pain in my side going down to my leg, in tears. I'm not one for relying on prescriptions, so it was trial and error with holistic remedies. Took about a week and a half to find the right "cocktail" of herbal medications and Thermacare back wraps (it heats up upon air contact) to get the pain down to a manageable level. Now, I don't need the back wraps anymore, and the sciatica is only aggravated when the weather changes or I twist my lower back the wrong way.

Then came March, and this will be the hardest part of this post. On March 9th, 12:30am my grandfather came and took my little Prince. If you follow me on instagram, then you'll understand that line. My precious little Prince, Kaos, left us.

Kaos and myself December 1999
We got Kaos back in November of 1999, we had lost our Golden Retriever earlier, and Patch was lonely.

Kay-Kay was my rock when my Grandfather passed, and more of my rock when Patch passed away three months after Papa. He was like a little person. He'd sit up in the chair, resting one of his front legs on the arm rest. We'd even call him Father Kaos, only because if we'd cuss, his ears would go back and he'd just stare at you. You'd have to apologize before he'd go running back around. If he wanted to be picked up, he'd get a vice grip on your arm and would jump up on your feet.

My heart was broken, completely shattered. Sunday I woke up crying and hadn't really stopped. Monday, we went to work, and I would immediately burst out crying. I had been numb when it came to Papa and Patch, but Kaos. He was the little Prince who came back through everything. He was like the little energizer bunny. Everything was setting me off. It got to the point that week, that I was becoming physically sick.

On March 15th, basically a week after Papa came to get Kaos, we adopted a new little guy, named Max, who needed us as much as we needed him. Max is a year and a half old Irish Jack Russell (yes, there's actually three different Jack Russell breeds).

March 2014
We've had people telling us that it was too soon to get a dog. That we weren't honoring Kaos, that we were replacing Kaos.

Our family friend, who is our doctor, said that getting a new dog would be the best thing to do. It's therapy. You can't replace a dog with another dog, what you're doing is just finding a new friend. And a new friend can help you heal.

When I was born, we had a dog. So all my life I grew up having dogs. There was never a single moment where I didn't have a dog or two (usually two). Going a week without a dog in the house was scary. The routine we had was thrown off, our lives were thrown off. And to be honest, I never wanted to go home to an empty, quiet house. It's heartbreaking. Even having the cat inside, it didn't feel right.

March 15th 2014, the day we adopted Max
Max is our little shining light. He actually looks like a combination of both Patch (who had an all brown face) and Kaos (all white with a little black on the ear) and has a combination of their personalities. 

Have I forgotten Kaos? Absolutely not, even after a month I can't look at his photos without crying. It's still fresh and it still hurts, and I get even more annoyed when people accuse me of forgetting him.

I do believe (as odd as it may sound) that someday I will find Kaos again, or a dog with the same personality as him.

I know this is a long post, and I thank anyone who read through it. I'm going to get myself back into the blogging world, just have to find that routine again.

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